TMI Tuesday: The Story of How I Married A Man I Met Online.

Okay class. Raise your hand if you’ve ever met a guy or gal online. Technically everyone should be raising their hands. I mean who hasn’t chit-chatted with someone in emails and then met up with them at a local event, conference or meeting? It happens allllll the time.

Sooooo what about dating online? Would you do it? Have you done it? Known someone who has? I do! I not only have gal pals who have met their husbands online but I met mine online.

Yep.

Esposo and I met on Match.com. I used to be embarrassed by it but now I have no problem with people knowing that I met the love of my life online. Does my meeting a man online mean that I’m too pathetic, lame or ugly to meet someone in real life? Hell no. Unfortunately, I think that’s the stigma that comes with dating online. People say…

-“Well, what if he turns out to be a serial killer?”
-“OMG, it’s toooo expensive to date online. Starbucks, I can justify…but dating online? No!”
-“I don’t want to tell my grandkids I met their grandfather online. That’s not romantic.”
-“What will my family say?”
-“What if everything he told me were lies?”

I was totally in agreement with the idea telling that the story of how we met wouldn’t be romantic. But that’s a lie. Everything about our story is laced with romanticism. I couldn’t see that because I was too busy caring about what other people thought. I’ve seen the light now and when people ask how we met, I tell them. With pride.

The internet holds a great chunk of my personal and professional life. I’ve gotten job opportunities, met amazing people and have developed my passions online. I even pay my bills online. With all that WE do online, is it really crazy to consider dating online? I don’t think so. I have one friend in particular who I met in a social networking site when I was 14 years old. We are STILL friends and in some ways closer than the people I went to school with (XOXO Stef!).

After a friend signed over her Match.com account to me, I innocently explored the site without any expectations. With only 3 weeks before the subscription ended, I had NO luck running across anyone interesting. While I didn’t have intentions of meeting Mr. Right, I didn’t even spot Mr. Halfway Decent.

The way Esposo tells the story, he says that I sent him a flirt. I believe it’s the other way around. Either way, after weeks of chit-chatting via email, we met.

I was all like, “Okay. If he is THIS cool electronically, he’s got to be even more awesome in person.”

Fail. He was nice but nothing clicked.

Nothing clicked on the second date either.

But like they say, “Three’s a charm.” I’ll never know what happened, but our third date was magical. We talked and laughed for hours. We fell in love that third date and almost a year and half later, we got married.

One of our wedding cakes.

I can’t remember where I read it but I saw a statistic that said couples that meet online stay together longer and eventually get married sooner than those that don’t meet online. Dude. I believe it. Considering there are so many websites that for people with all kinds of interests (religion, race, hobbies, location, etc), finding someone you may actually connect with can be so much easier. I realize that online dating isn’t for everyone. To even consider it, you have to be comfortable with yourself and you have to be extremely open-minded.

You should also be an undercover detective. Esposo didn’t know it then, but by our second date, I had run his license tag, found out his current address, date of birth and if he had ever been arrested. I didn’t spend all of those years watching Lifetime moves for nothing.

I could list a crap load of reasons why online dating can be scary. But so can dating the cutie you meet at the grocery store. Or at a party. Dating has its risks no matter how you do it. I just know when it comes to online dating, I can list list at least FOUR close friends who have met and married their online sweethearts.

Yep. He’s as silly as I am.

It’s hard not to believe that Esposo and I have lived in the same city for years and never crossed paths. Orlando is huge. We had different social circles. I don’t think I would have ever just run into someone as incredible as him by luck or chance. Maybe. Maybe not. Still. I think it’s pretty darn cool that a website matched us up and e-introduced us.

I’m sure every Match.com subscription doesn’t end in marriage. But neither does every Guy Meets Girl at a coffee shop scenario. All I know is, my experience with online dating led me to the love of my life.

Now that it’s out there. Who wants to reach out to Match.com to see if they’ll put us on a commercial?

Ha! I’m kidding. Unless they’re payin’. :cool:

Seriously though – what are your thoughts on online dating?

P.S.
If you want to read lovey-dovey stuffs, check out me and Esposo’s Eloping Story.

B’s Discoveries of 2011

Well y’all. It’s about to be a new year. Some people are very “whatever” about the New Year but honestly – I LOVE them. I spent most of my New Year’s Eve’s in church. A few years ago I started traveling. This year, I will be enjoying a staycation with Esposo in Orlando and getting my mind right for 2012.

Oh. And celebrating like a mofo because guess who will be 27 on January 2nd? Oooooh yeah. No shame in my game. I am 27 and proud, yo! Before we bid adieu to 2011, I wanted to drop a list of some of my best and most memorble discoveries of this year.

Share yours too!

 

Body-Wise

  • Gray hair. I knew this was coming. Mama Clumps always said women on her side of the family always go gray early. While I have no problem getting older, there’s just something about gray hair. I’m so not ready for it.
  • The menstrual cup. My discovery of the greener and more comfortable alternative to sanitary napkins was reason enough to make 2011 epic. I can’t even begin to tell you how I love my Diva Cup and Lunette Cup.
  • Weight gain. Okay yeah. I’ll admit it. I gained a whopping 20 pounds this year. I call it a discovery because  I literally just discovered it. Never mind that I’m having to buy 14’s and see the obvious weight gain in my face when I take pictures. Oh. And it didn’t help that I got a YouTube comment asking if I was preggo. Dang. While  I am sad about it, I’m confident that I’ll drop the weight again. I’ve done so before!

Products

  • These lip balms. And don’t you dare ask me to choose a favorite. I just can’t.
  • Aaaaand, the Best Lengthening Mascara Award goes toooo…..this guy!
  • I tried Butter London for the first time this year. SO in love with this brand.
  • I tried a whole heap of Boscia this year and they are one of my FAVORITE skincare brands to date.

Personal

  • Age doesn’t matter. I always feared getting older. I was always afraid that I didn’t do enough at 23, 24 or 25. That’s nuts. I’ve done a lot. And as long as I’m living I will continue to do a lot. Life is a blessing and I will no longer be sad about being granted the opportunity to live another year.
  • Having an untraditional wedding was exactly what I wanted all along. I’m so glad Esposo and I started off our marriage the way we did. I have no regrets in not having a big lavish wedding. We did things our way and didn’t have to take out loans to do it. Hollers!

 

 

Food

  • Red onions. I didn’t start liking them until this year.
  • Goat cheese. God himself may have made this cheese. Aside from it being the only kind of cheese that doesn’t make my tummy go haywire, everything from goat cheese pizza to goat cheese salad is just delicious. Goat cheese is life.
  • I discovered and fell in love with both Indian and Ethiopian cuisines; which is refreshing. I was stuck on the Thai, Vietnamese and vegetarian tracks for quite some time.

Hobbies

  • Pinterest. I purposely stayed away from this site for many months. I knew an addiction awaited me. I eventually gave in and because of Pinterest, I have been inspired to  becreative beyond belief. And yes, I definitely consider it a hobby.
  • Knitting. No real reason really. I’ve always wanted to and finally decided to actually do it. Once I master knitting, I want to try crocheting. I take my first class in the new year!
  • Soap making. As an apprentice, I’ve found so much joy in mixing up herbal blends and gifting friends and family members with my creations.

 

Music

  • Lenny Kravitz. How can I just be discovering his music? Three words: He is amazing.
  • Asa. Jazz is my first love and this Nigerian artist sings to my soul. I love her vibe and the positivity in her music.
  • DeBarge. Okay yeah – I’ve known about them for years but their music, OMG…soooo underrated.
  • Bebel Gilberto introduced me to Bossa Nova, a genre of music that is now one of my favorites.

 

TV

…this one is short because I’m just not a TV/movie-watcher.

  • The Walking Dead. I’m not a lover of zombies, vampires and mythical creatures. After a coworker recommended that I watch this show, I became such a huge fan. Sure, it’s a little slow (okay….very slow) but the drama is always to the n-th degree.
  • Law & Order SVU. Never mind that this show has been on for over a decade. One boring evening, I decided to finally watch an episode on Netflix and to say I was hooked is an understatement. Let’s say I have seen every episode and cried when Elliot left the show.

Sick Blogger, Winter 2010

I blame myself really. I haven’t been getting enough sleep, taking my Vitamin C or drinking my green smoothies. So um, yeah…I’m sick. And it’s not pretty. I’ll spare you the details because I love y’all. And oh…emerge from your RSS reader and Clumps’ inbox emails to check out the new page design. Pretty groovy, uh?

I’ll be back when I’m not coughing up a lung. While I rest up, check out some posts from Clumps that you may have missed.

-OPI and konading
-Winged eye shadow and super pink lips
-Pink/Orange eye shadow look
-Huetiful Hair steamer review
-Yellow eye shadow on a brown gal?

Guess who’s baaack?

I’m back!

I know, I know…I really should have never just dropped off of the face of the e-earth like that, uh? My bad, y’all. I took a much needed withdrawal from the innanet. I SO needed it. Not to mention I started an evening/weekend job and OMG, I completely failed in the time management department.

But I’m back now and I have SO much to share with you. Here’s what reviews you can look forward to in the coming weeks:

  • OCC lip tars. Yuuuum….
  • Clarisonic Plus
  • My annual visit to the dermatologist. Has my skin improved since last year? Pshttt.
  • Orly’s Plastix collection. Sick of mattes yet?
  • CoverFX foundation…I think I found a winner, y’all.
  • Mario Badescu skincare products
  • Huetiful Hair steamer. Amazing!!
  • Zoya’s newest polishes
  • CoverGirl Queen’s concealers…SO brown girl friendly
  • Make Up For Ever’s HD blush
  • An eye shadow palette that has 120 shadows. Wow…sers!

…my Twitter fam has asked me to review my new Android phone so I think I’ll be doing that too. Yep, after 2 years and 3 Blackberrys, I have broken up with RIM and so in love with Android!

That’s not even half of it. I will also be hosting, co-hosting and volunteering for several events (that you’re invited to) in the Central and South Florida…including Shecky’s Girl’s Night Out in Miami! And I’ve got a lot of giveaways lined up.

OH! And I’m actively posting on the Clumps of Mascara Tumblr blog. It’s just random shots of products, events and looks. Not to be confused with my travel blog which is also on Tumblr.

So yep…I’m back and ready to par-tay! How have you guys been? Try any new mascaras? Have any products you think I should try?

Enjoy your weekend and see you for Mascara Monday!

The best of Clumps of Mascara a la video

I hope you’re having a fantastic Friday, darlings! I’m in the best mood ever. Ever have one of those days where nothing really happened but you’re just happy? I’m definitely having one of those days. Below is a video to make you laugh. It’s a compilation of some of my YouTube videos.


I am finally at the point where I’m okay with being me unapologetically. Are you there too? I certainly hope so. Life sucks when you can’t be you. I don’t know about you but I find NOT being me extremely painful. Celebrate yourself this weekend.

Speaking of celebrations, one of my greatest friends celebrates a birthday this weekend!

Happy birthday, Sam! Thank you so much for blessing me with the role of godmommy to the most perfect little girl in the world. You’ve always be a phenomenal woman in my eyes but motherhood has given me another reason to respect and admire you. You are amazing and I love you to pieces!

And if this baby face doesn’t make your day, I think you may need to check your pulse.

Enjoy your weekend!

My Foundation…

Yo yo yo, lady friends, let’s rap on foundation.

Wait…I’m not talking about the foundation we put on our faces. I’m talking about support systems. The people that hold you down. The things that inspire you do go where you want to go.

When I think about “The Makings of B” (sounds like a dope album title, uh?), I think of myself like a house.

See! There I am. I’m a brick….houuuse!

Now don’t y’all go laughing at me. Writer, I am. Artist, I am not. Hehe!

Without a foundation, I may stand up for a bit. But eventually I would sink.

No bueno, right? My foundation is a strong faith in God. Now I know everyone isn’t “religious” or “spiritual” and I respect that. But mannnn, I’m not sure WHERE I would be without my belief. Actually, I’d be in jail for having knocked someone out. Seriously. My faith in God keeps me going when I feel like stopping. It’s what gives me a sense of purpose. It gives me that extra “umph”. My foundation is really enough to keep me up, but I also need the flowers in my life.

 Don’t know where I would be without them. My house looks better because of the flowers. It is because of them that I stand stronger. And they bring me a ton of happiness.

Am I making sense or are y’all falling asleep?

Okay, your turn…what’s your foundation?

I’m back!

Did you miss me? I certainly missed y’all. I don’t think I’ve ever gone a week without blogging on Clumps since…EVER! I actually teared up a bit the evening my hiatus started. It just felt “strange” to not blog. I got over it a few days later. I found myself doing things I never get a chance to do.
Like…read!!!

I’ve had 3 issues of Black Enterprise that I hadn’t read yet. Read them all. And I finally finished Tony Dungy’s and started and finished Sophie Kinsella’s newest. She is one of my favorite authors ever!

And then I did something I’ve always wanted to do…

I bought a used bike! It’s sittin’ in my living room (classy, uh?) shivering. I’m afraid to ride it! I know, I know. I haven’t ridden a non-stationary bike in years and I’m a little nervous. Are y’all laughing at me?

I visited my babies! In Hollywood and Miami I have two almost two year old boys.

Aren’t they darling? My honorary godson and cousin are hilarious! I’m used to little girls so being around these little men is always fun. And then there’s my darling goddaughter Sophie who is 6 weeks old.

She’s amazing. Just amazing.

I fell in love with a new Vegan Restaurant in Orlando.

That’s vegan BBQ, curry rice and veggies. Loving Hut has a new and obsessed customer.

And I finally mastered some yoga poses. Including the crane…

As long as it is completely silent, I can hold this for at least a minute. And I haven’t broken my arm yet. Holla! This photo comes from one of my favorite yoga websites.

I feel refreshed and renewed. I caught got caught up on my editorial calendar and don’t feel as stressed as I was before. Thank you all for supporting the hiatus. I have so many things to share.

But tell me…what’s goin’ on in your world? Anything you want to see on Clumps? Did I miss anything?

Clumps’ Hiatus 2010

Well, my loves…the time as come for me to bid farewell. I’m taking a bit of a break from Clumps. No no no, it’s not anything you’ve done, but sometimes I can get a wee bit overwhelmed. But from editing videos, to drafting posts, writing freelance pieces, taking photos, responding to emails and staying connected on Facebook and Twitter, I can honestly say that I enjoy it all. If it weren’t for you all’s support, Clumps wouldn’t exist. Your love and encouragement has meant the world to me. Did I ever tell you that Clumps is my passion? Seriously. It combines ALL of my loves; beauty, writing, helping others, new media, photography, web design, video production, entrepreneurship and traveling. Funny how one minute I’m a 23-year old trying to find my way in life and the next thing I know, I’m starting a blog with a funny title that has turned into a business. Your passion may be right in front of you, fam. It was for me.

This hiatus won’t be easy. I’m a bit “obsessed” with Clumps. But I’m looking forward to doing things I never have the time to do. Like read, work on the scrapbook for my goddaughter, go bike riding,  master some yoga stances, make phone calls (instead of text, HA!) and think of ways to make Clumps better. I’m learning that the best way to keep your passion a “passion” is to prevent it from becoming like work. To keep it enjoyable, sometimes you have to take a break.

I’ll be checking my email thirty-two times once day. If you need me…I’m there!

Oh! And Ying is the winner from the Snubbr giveaway. Speaking of giveaways, I’ve got a TON coming up for when I return. Excited yet?

See ya when I see ya!