Okay, before you self-righteous mommies start slamming me, LISTEN – I’m okay with being away from my children. I don’t always like it but I deal with it because mommy has to work and live and sometimes that means leaving my children in the (hopefully) capable hands of someone else. I’m not alone. Most mothers across the world are working mothers and long gone are the days of having your mom, grandma or aunt watch your kid. Shoot, my mom is still working! I am proud to be a working mother and while I deal with mommy guilt regularly (who doesn’t?), don’t come for me in the “OMGGGGG, this is why I never leave my kids” department. Because I ain’t tryna hear it.
Okay. Sweet disclosure, right? Now that I’ve gotten that out of the way, come join me over here on the rug while I tell you story about how I almost punched the babysitter.
We’ve used many babysitters before. Almost half a dozen. Most have been referrals from friends and I always find these to be the best fit. But in the past year, several of our sitters moved, graduated and got married. Which, sucks…. I mean, how dare they live their lives when I need them to help me with mine! Whatever. I mourned their fleeting and I’ve been on the hunt for a new sitter ever since – mainly for EB.
Esposo works a loooooot. Many of his hours are worked out of town but even those that aren’t, it is not out of the norm to go days without seeing him because he leaves before we wake up and comes home after the kids and I are in bed. We’ve got no family in town and this year I finally admitted that I REALLY needed help. So the searching began.
I interviewed about 6 girls. I used Care.com (many of my fellow mothers said they found great sitters using this service) and love how easy the site is. We found Melanie* and she seemed to be great. We called her in for an interview.
The red flags went up the minute I met her. She just didn’t seem “into” this. She wasn’t excited. She didn’t really interact with our girl. I kept telling myself that maybe she was just lowkey. Y’know…not everyone has an excitable personality. I mean, I think you should if you’re a babysitter but it wasn’t a huge deal breaker.
It should have been. The second red flag was her lack of voices when she’d read EB stories. Because, I’m sorry…you can’t read a kid a book and NOT do the voices.
Sadly, the third and final deal breaker was one that had my blood boiling so hot, it could have melted the snow left from that snowstorm Jonas. After returning from my trek at The Makeup Show Orlando, I not only arrived to a trashed house but also to news that my toddler had no problem delivering…
EB: I went to the park, mama.
Me: You did? Did you have fun!
EB: Yes! I was in Melanie’s car.
Me: You were in her car? What do you mean?
EB: I was in her car and we went to the park.
This babysitter put my petite baby in her car without a car seat. I.couldn’t.even. I couldn’t breathe. I calmly called Melanie who confirmed that she indeed put EB in her car without a seat.
“It wasn’t that far. I thought we’d be fine.”
In my head, I punched this girl. If I had found this out while she was still at the house, I would have punched her. I know, I’m terrible. And probably a little violent. But lemme tell you, Mama Bear doesn’t play nicely when you put her babes in danger. Anything could have happened in the 5 minutes that they were in the car. The possibilities played over and over again in my head. I couldn’t sleep that night. I woke up the next morning and called to fuss at Melanie again. She needed to understand how stupid her decision was. The way she brushed it off infuriated me. She didn’t get it.
I could have punched her. I still want to punch her. But naw, I can’t do, jail time, y’all. They don’t serve dairy-free options. 😂
In conclusion: I almost punched the babysitter.
The End
*name changed to prevent my village from finding this sitter.
B, I’m so sorry. Sounds like it’s time to leave a detailed review of that sitter on Care.com & contact someone in customer service. Basic vetting and training should be a given when you get a sitter through a caregivers site, and your experience just raises so many safety flags. I’m with you, mama bear!
I’ve done it. I left a very detailed review. It wasn’t mean but I definitely left a warning for other parents.
Good for you, it takes a strong person who can control her tongue and not be mean! I know your review will help others make an informed decision as they look for someone competent to provide loving care for their kiddo(s). And I bet you’ll find a gem of a sitter soon… don’t give up! It’s wise of you to have realized that parenting takes a lot out of you & that you need a break. The big secret? All parents–whether or not they work outside of the home–need a break in order to really be the best mom or dad they can be! Big hugs!
i am dying!!!!!! naturally we can only laugh because EB is safe and fine and able to rat out the babysitter without thinking about it. but man… to be a fly on that wall!
Giiiiiiirl….!!!
My heart is beating so fast! I’m so pissed at this chick! I cannot believe she thought this was ok! I probably would have invited her back just to punch her in the face.
HAAAA! Don’t give me any ideas, mama. LOL!
Oh NO. Absolutely not. You reminded me of my story, which I may have to turn into a blog post. The short version is, my original babysitter was giving my four month old breastfed daughter BABY FOOD (like Gerber bananas) without asking or telling us, and couldn’t understand why that was a problem. But she KNEW it was a problem, because she was using her own disposable diapers, so I wouldn’t see the strange poop when the cloth diapers came home. I could have choked her.
Whaaaat!!!! I.would.go.OFF! Girl. That may trump this. Jacking up a child’s digestive system is just as un-safe. Wooooow.
My goodness I could seriously feel my blood pressure going up as I read this. Seriously. I’m so thankful that I have enough family around that I don’t need to use a baby sitter. I would have gotten in my car, driven over to her house, and knocked her out…with the car seat just for good measure. Power to you for keeping it as cool as you did!
You’re very lucky, Jennifer. Trust me. Not having family around to help with my babes is quite literally heartbreaking.
Omg!!! I seriously want to handle this chica for you. Good thing I’m up North!
Giiiiirl…LOL!